I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
