True but thats because hes a fetus.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
