I swear she didn't look like that last week.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
