belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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