Kiss
Puke
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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