I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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