Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
