it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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