I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
You left your phone here
Wait...
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