What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
