there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
