i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize