i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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