Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
