I cockslap morals
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Of course I have a pirate flag
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
