shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
