He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
