shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
