i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
