I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
