yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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