I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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