Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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