Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
