yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
