so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize