Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize