Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
