It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I AM VODKA MAN
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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