I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize