How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
