I'm really into asian looking animals
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
