its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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