What a fucking waste of an outfit
Its about making memories worth repressing
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Randomize
