when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
