What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
