What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
a search helicopter?!
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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