I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Randomize
