I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
