I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
