Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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