it's like iHOP with fire
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
