my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
