butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
