Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
the day after is always just damage control
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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