the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just pee around me
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
he just fucked me for my cheese..
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
