Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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