Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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