i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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