he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
